Every day, someone on the internet confidently tells you the wrong thing about tire pressure, toothpaste, or gas. This deck is the friend who gently corrects them, then tells a dad joke.
Little everyday facts save money, keep you safe, and make you the person your family calls before they do something questionable to the lawn mower.
Chapter 1: Fuel and Efficiency
Short answer: Only if your fuel door or manual says premium required
- Too little: Regular in an engine that requires premium: knocking and damage
- Too much: Premium in a car built for regular: you're just tipping the gas station
- Just right: Whatever your fuel door or owner's manual says
Octane is knock resistance, not extra energy. AAA found no gain in power, mileage or emissions in cars built for regular. Use what your fuel door or manual says.
Worth remembering: AAA tested it: no gain in power, mileage, or emissions in cars built for regular.
Groan of the day: I put premium in my lawn mower once. Now it only mows golf courses.
Sources: AAA premium fuel research for regular-fuel vehicles; AAA premium recommended vehicle testing
Short answer: About 30 seconds, then drive gently
- Too little: Scrape a peephole in the frost and go
- Too much: Let it idle 10 to 15 minutes
- Just right: About 30 seconds, then drive gently
Modern engines only need about 30 seconds. Driving gently warms the engine faster than idling, which just burns gas. But clear every window before you go.
Worth remembering: The engine warms up faster being driven than idling.
Groan of the day: I couldn't figure out how my seatbelt worked. Then it just clicked.
Sources: U.S. Department of Energy Energy Saver guide; NHTSA winter driving tips
Short answer: Above about 50 mph
- Too little: Speed doesn't change mileage
- Too much: Drive as fast as traffic allows
- Just right: Avoid unnecessary speed and obey the limit
Mileage usually drops quickly above 50 mph. Each extra 5 mph is like paying more for every gallon. Obeying the speed limit saves gas and is safer.
Worth remembering: A big roof cargo box can cut highway mileage by 6% to 17%.
Groan of the day: Why can't you take a nap during a race? Because if you snooze, you lose.
Sources: Fueleconomy.gov (DOE and EPA): Driving More Efficiently
Short answer: No, stop when the nozzle clicks off
- Too little: Run the tank nearly empty every time
- Too much: Keep squeezing until it's to the brim
- Just right: Stop when the pump clicks off
The click usually means stop. Topping off can spill or overfill fuel and damage the car's vapor-control equipment, so do not squeeze in more.
Worth remembering: The pump knows to stop because gas covers a little sensing hole at the tip of the nozzle.
Groan of the day: What kind of car does a farmer drive? A cornvertible.
Sources: Oregon Department of Environmental Quality: Gasoline Dispensing Facilities; U.S. EPA news release (2004): Don't Top off Your Gas Tank
Short answer: Up to about 25%
A blunt box on the roof pushes against the wind. The Department of Energy says a large one cuts mileage around 10% to 25% at Interstate speeds. Take it off when you don't need it.
Worth remembering: A rear-mount cargo box or tray costs much less mileage than a rooftop box.
Groan of the day: Why did the car bring a suitcase? Because it was ready for a long trip and didn't want to be caught short!
Sources: Driving More Efficiently (fueleconomy.gov, US DOE)
Chapter 2: Tires and Routine Maintenance
Short answer: The number on the sticker in the driver's door jamb
- Too little: Squishy tires, worn edges, wasted gas
- Too much: Pumped to the sidewall max, worn center, less grip
- Just right: Door sticker number, checked cold, once a month
The number on the tire is the maximum it can hold. Your carmaker's number is on the door jamb sticker. Check it cold, once a month.
Worth remembering: Tires lose about 1 PSI for every 10°F drop, and the tire light doesn't come on until you're about 25% low.
Groan of the day: I told my tires to stop being so dramatic. They said they're under a lot of pressure.
Sources: NHTSA summer driving tire guidance; NHTSA TireWise pressure guidance; Michelin cold weather tire pressure guidance
Short answer: In the morning, before you drive
- Too little: Only when the warning light comes on
- Too much: Check it after every single drive
- Just right: Check it cold, before driving
Driving warms the tires and raises the pressure, so a warm reading looks too high. Check before you drive for the most accurate number.
Worth remembering: Tires can slowly lose air even when the weather stays the same, so check often, like every other fill-up.
Groan of the day: What happens when a frog's car breaks down? It gets toad away.
Sources: Firestone Complete Auto Care: Should I Inflate My Tires in Cold Weather?
Short answer: About 1 PSI
- Too little: Ignore it, it comes back
- Too much: Inflate far above the door-label pressure
- Just right: Recheck pressure when it turns cold
As temperature falls, tire pressure drops about 1 PSI per 10°F. That is why the low-pressure light often pops on during the first cold morning.
Worth remembering: A 20°F cold snap can lower tire pressure by about 2 PSI.
Groan of the day: Why did the tire need a vacation? It couldn't take the pressure anymore.
Sources: Bridgestone and Firestone: Tire Maintenance, Safety and Warranty Manual
Short answer: Acceleration, not gas mileage
Many people think a new air filter saves gas. The Department of Energy says on modern fuel-injected gas engines it does not improve mileage, but it can improve acceleration.
Worth remembering: On an older carbureted vehicle, replacing a clogged filter can improve both mileage and acceleration.
Groan of the day: Have you heard the story about the magic tractor? It drove down the road and turned into a field.
Sources: Keeping Your Vehicle in Shape (fueleconomy.gov, US DOE)
Short answer: Your gas mileage can drop
The Department of Energy says using a thicker grade than the engine was designed for can lower gas mileage. Follow the grade in the owner's manual.
Worth remembering: DOE estimates that using the recommended oil grade can improve gas mileage by 1% to 2%.
Groan of the day: I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!
Sources: Keeping Your Vehicle in Shape (fueleconomy.gov, US DOE)
Chapter 3: Weather, Heat and Sun
Short answer: 30 minutes after the last thunder
- Too little: As soon as the rain stops
- Too much: Stay inside for the rest of the day
- Just right: 30 minutes after the last thunder
Lightning can strike up to 10 miles from a storm, even after the rain stops. Wait 30 minutes after the last thunder. Tents and picnic shelters don't protect you; a building or a hard-topped car does.
Worth remembering: Tents and picnic shelters don't protect you from lightning; a building or a hard-topped car does.
Groan of the day: What does a cloud wear under its raincoat? Thunderwear.
Sources: National Weather Service: When a Safe Building or Vehicle is Nearby; National Weather Service: Social Media Lightning Safety
Short answer: Yes, a storm miles away can send water your way
The National Weather Service says dry canyons and riverbeds can be dangerous even when it isn't raining. A thunderstorm several miles away can dump water that rushes downstream to you.
Worth remembering: Desert ground is so hard that it can't soak up much rain, so storm water races into low spots like washes and canyons.
Groan of the day: What has a bed that you can't sleep in? A river.
Sources: Flood Related Hazards (National Weather Service)
Short answer: Spread out from each other
The National Weather Service says a group caught outside should spread out. This lowers the chance of several people being hurt by one strike and leaves others able to give first aid.
Worth remembering: The Weather Service says if you camp in the backcountry, set up your tent in a low area away from tall, isolated trees.
Groan of the day: How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning? He was a good conductor.
Sources: Outdoor Lightning Risk Reduction (National Weather Service)
Short answer: Up to 80 percent
Snow is a mirror for UV light. EPA says snow can reflect as much as 80 percent of UV, nearly doubling exposure. Sunscreen and sunglasses matter in winter too.
Worth remembering: EPA says UV increases about 2 percent for every 1,000 feet of elevation because mountain air is thinner.
Groan of the day: What did one snowman say to the other snow man? Do you smell carrot?
Sources: A Guide to the UV Index (US EPA)
Chapter 4: Phishing and Scams
Short answer: None of them, ever
No real business or government agency will ever tell you to buy a gift card to pay them. Anyone who asks for the numbers off the back of a card is a scammer.
Worth remembering: If it already happened, keep the card and the receipt and report it to the gift card company right away.
Groan of the day: Where can you always find money? In the dictionary.
Sources: FTC: Avoiding and Reporting Gift Card Scams
Short answer: Look at the web address it opens before typing anything
Scammers have been caught putting their own QR stickers over the real ones on parking meters. Before you type anything, look at the web address and check for misspellings or a switched letter. A fake site can steal whatever you type.
Groan of the day: Dogs can't operate MRI machines. But catscan.
Sources: FTC: Scammers hide harmful links in QR codes to steal your information
Short answer: Hang up without pressing buttons
Hang up. Pressing buttons can lead to more robocalls.
Worth remembering: Your carrier may offer tools to block or label unwanted calls.
Groan of the day: Why did the robot go on vacation? It needed to recharge its batteries.
Sources: FTC: Phone Scams
Short answer: Whether the web address is spelled correctly
A QR code can hide a link to a convincing fake site. Inspect the previewed address before opening it, and watch for a misspelled name or switched letter. Use a known website if the code was unexpected.
Worth remembering: The FTC warns a scam QR code can open a spoofed site that looks real, or install malware.
Groan of the day: What does one barcode say after bumping into another barcode? SKU me.
Sources: Scammers hide harmful links in QR codes to steal your information
Chapter 5: Common Health Questions
Short answer: No, you need to catch a virus
You can only catch a cold if you come into contact with a cold virus. Being chilly might make you shiver, but it cannot create a germ.
Worth remembering: People get sick more in winter because they stay indoors, breathing the same air as infected people.
Groan of the day: What do you catch but never throw? A cold.
Sources: CDC: About Common Cold
Short answer: 100.4°F
Many health organizations use 100.4°F as the standard fever threshold.
Worth remembering: A thermometer is more reliable than guessing by touch.
Groan of the day: Why did the thermometer get promoted? It had degrees.
Sources: CDC: Definitions of Signs, Symptoms, and Conditions of Ill Travelers
Short answer: No, colds are viruses and antibiotics can't touch them
- Too little: Ignore a cold that lasts for weeks
- Too much: Ask for antibiotics for every sniffle
- Just right: Treat symptoms; ask a professional if concerned
Antibiotics treat certain infections caused by bacteria, not viruses. Colds are caused by viruses, so antibiotics won't make you feel better. Unneeded antibiotics can still cause side effects.
Worth remembering: Thick yellow or green mucus does not mean you need an antibiotic. It happens with ordinary colds too.
Groan of the day: What do you call a sick crocodile? An illigator.
Sources: CDC: Antibiotic Use, About; CDC: Antibiotic Use, About (same page, cold list)
Short answer: No, it can't cause flu illness
- Too little: Skip it because it 'gives you the flu'
- Too much: Fear a sore arm means you're sick
- Just right: Get it; a sore arm isn't the flu
Flu shots are made from killed flu viruses or just one protein from the virus, so they can't make you sick with flu. A sore arm or mild achiness is a side effect, not the flu.
Worth remembering: Even the nasal spray flu vaccine, made with weakened live viruses, cannot cause flu. Those viruses only grow in the cool nose, not the lungs.
Groan of the day: Why did the doctor tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? To avoid waking the sleeping pills.
Sources: CDC: Key Facts About Seasonal Flu Vaccine; CDC: Key Facts About Seasonal Flu Vaccine (flu shots)
Chapter 6: Healthy Habits
Short answer: 7 or more hours
CDC says adults 18 to 60 need 7 or more hours a night. Less sleep makes it harder to focus, stay healthy, and drive safely.
Worth remembering: Adults 65 and older are advised to get 7 to 8 hours.
Groan of the day: Why did the bed go to the doctor? It had spring fever.
Sources: CDC: About Sleep
Short answer: No, it eventually washes off
FDA says there is no waterproof sunscreen. Water-resistant ones must say if they last 40 or 80 minutes while you swim or sweat.
Worth remembering: After that time, or after towel drying, put more on.
Groan of the day: What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
Sources: FDA: Sunscreen and Sun Protection
Short answer: 3 or higher
UV rays can damage skin even on cool or cloudy days.
Worth remembering: Snow and water can reflect UV rays.
Groan of the day: What does the sun eat for breakfast? Light toast.
Sources: CDC: Sun Safety Facts
Short answer: About one ounce
Dermatologists say most adults need about one ounce of sunscreen to cover exposed skin. That is about enough to fill a shot glass.
Worth remembering: Depending on your body size, you may need more than one ounce to cover all exposed skin.
Groan of the day: What did the ocean say to the beach? Thanks for all the sediment.
Sources: American Academy of Dermatology Sunscreen Statistics
Chapter 7: First Aid and CPR
Short answer: Forward
Sit up and lean forward. This keeps blood from going down your throat.
Worth remembering: Pinch both nostrils shut for 10 to 15 minutes, breathing through your mouth.
Groan of the day: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
Sources: Mayo Clinic: Nosebleeds, First aid
Short answer: No more than ten seconds
Use shout-tap-shout while quickly checking breathing and major bleeding. Limiting the check prevents delay in calling for help and starting care.
Worth remembering: The Red Cross says to talk to and reassure an unresponsive person, because they may still hear you.
Groan of the day: Why did the alarm clock cross the road? It was time to get to the other side.
Sources: Unresponsive and Breathing Person, American Red Cross
Short answer: Begin CPR with compressions
Unresponsiveness changes the choking response. Place the infant on a firm, flat surface and begin CPR with compressions while emergency help is activated.
Worth remembering: The Red Cross says infant chest thrusts should be about 1 and a half inches deep.
Groan of the day: Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because its parents were in a jam.
Sources: Infant Choking, American Red Cross
Short answer: It may conceal internal injury
Electrical current can injure tissue below a small surface mark. After making sure the power source is safe, get emergency medical care.
Worth remembering: The Red Cross says to make sure the power source is off before you go near the person.
Groan of the day: Two atoms were walking. One said, 'I lost an electron.' The other asked, 'Are you sure?' 'Yes, I'm positive.'
Sources: Burns First Aid, American Red Cross
Chapter 8: Everyday Money Skills
Short answer: Yes, federal law does not require cash acceptance
- Too little: Never carry any cash at all
- Too much: Argue legal tender with the cashier
- Just right: Carry a card plus a little cash
Cash is legal tender for paying debts, but no federal law makes a private business accept it. Some states and cities have their own rules that do.
Worth remembering: Legal tender means cash is a valid way to pay a debt you already owe, like a bill.
Groan of the day: What did one dollar say to the other? Hey, Bill.
Sources: Federal Reserve: Is it legal for a business to refuse cash as a form of payment?
Short answer: Use optoutprescreen.com or 1-888-5-OPT-OUT
- Too little: Toss them in the trash whole
- Too much: Call every card company one by one
- Just right: Opt out once, shred what still comes
The official service covers lists from the major credit bureaus, but mail can take several weeks to stop. You can opt out for five years, or permanently by mailing a signed form.
Worth remembering: Opting out will not stop offers based on lists from other sources.
Groan of the day: What travels around the world but stays in a corner? A stamp.
Sources: FTC: Prescreened Credit and Insurance Offers; FTC: Prescreened Credit and Insurance Offers (timing)
Short answer: About 7 years
- Too little: About a year
- Too much: Forever, if no one rips it
- Just right: About 7 years
The Federal Reserve estimates a $1 bill lasts about 7.2 years. Small bills change hands a lot, so they wear out faster. A $100 bill lasts about 24 years.
Worth remembering: Worn-out bills are taken out of circulation and destroyed, and new ones replace them.
Groan of the day: What did the dollar say to the four quarters? You've changed.
Sources: Federal Reserve: How long is the life span of U.S. paper money?
Short answer: At least 5 years
Federal law protects gift card funds for at least five years. If the card itself expires while funds remain, the issuer must provide a replacement card at no cost.
Worth remembering: Fees for not using a gift card generally can't start until after 12 months of no use.
Groan of the day: Where do owls go to buy their baby clothes? The owlet malls.
Sources: Giving or receiving gift cards? Know the terms and avoid surprises (CFPB)
Chapter 9: Health and Hygiene
Short answer: 20 seconds, about two Happy Birthdays
- Too little: A quick splash, no soap
- Too much: Scalding water and half the soap bottle
- Just right: Soap, 20 seconds, rinse and dry
The CDC says scrub with soap for 20 seconds, about humming Happy Birthday twice. Warm or cold water both work. Get the backs, between fingers and under nails.
Worth remembering: Warm or cold water both work. Scrub the backs, between your fingers, and under your nails.
Groan of the day: I dropped the soap and it shot right down the drain. Guess it made a clean getaway.
Sources: CDC About Handwashing
Short answer: 9 to 12 hours
CDC says kids 6 to 12 need 9 to 12 hours. Enough sleep helps attention, mood, and memory at school.
Worth remembering: Teens 13 to 17 need 8 to 10 hours, which is still more than most adults.
Groan of the day: What did the pencil say to the paper? Write on!
Sources: CDC: About Sleep
Short answer: About 15 minutes before
FDA says apply 15 minutes before sun exposure so the sunscreen has time to work. Waiting until you are pink is too late.
Worth remembering: An average person needs about one ounce, a shot glass, to cover the body.
Groan of the day: Why did the kid bring a ladder to the beach? To reach the high tide.
Sources: FDA: Sunscreen and Sun Protection
Chapter 10: Yard and Garden
Short answer: Fresh regular 87 with 10% ethanol or less
- Too little: Last summer's gas with water in the bottom
- Too much: Premium in a push mower
- Just right: Fresh regular, ethanol-free for anything that sits, stabilizer for storage
Small engines want fresh regular, E10 or less. E15 is not allowed in mowers, boats or motorcycles. Gas can start going bad in 30 days, so use stabilizer for storage.
Worth remembering: Ethanol pulls water out of the air, and gas can start going bad in as little as 30 days.
Groan of the day: My lawn mower and I have a lot in common. Let us sit all winter, and we're both hard to start in the spring.
Sources: Briggs & Stratton fuel FAQ; Honda Power Equipment; Mercury Marine fuel basics
Short answer: No more than one third
Removing too much leaf at once can shock the plant, dry the tips, and reduce lawn health.
Worth remembering: The correct finished height depends on the grass species and season.
Groan of the day: Why did the lawn mower go to therapy? It had deep seeded issues.
Sources: University of Maryland Extension: Maintaining an Established Lawn
Short answer: The product label
The label gives the approved directions, precautions, and restrictions for that exact product. Follow it rather than assuming all pesticides work alike.
Worth remembering: EPA says to keep children, toys and pets away until a pesticide has dried or as the label says.
Groan of the day: What do you call a bug that can tell time? A clock-roach.
Sources: Pesticide Safety Tips, EPA
Chapter 11: Child and Home Safety
Short answer: 120°F
Water at 140°F can cause a bad burn in about six seconds, but at 120°F it takes about five minutes. Some water heaters come set to 140°F from the factory. Turning it down to 120°F also slows mineral buildup in the tank and pipes.
Groan of the day: RIP boiled water. You will be mist.
Sources: Department of Energy: Purchasing Energy-Efficient Residential Water Heaters; CPSC: Avoiding Tap Water Scalds, 140°F timing; CPSC: Avoiding Tap Water Scalds, 120°F timing
Short answer: Anchor it to the wall
Kids may climb or pull on furniture and TVs. The CPSC's Anchor It campaign says anchoring furniture to the wall prevents tip-over injuries.
Worth remembering: Anchor It says to secure furniture with drawers, doors and shelves, not only dressers.
Groan of the day: I saw an ad: television for sale, $1, volume stuck on full. I thought, I can't turn that down.
Sources: Anchor It! (US Consumer Product Safety Commission)
Short answer: They tempt kids to climb
A kid reaching for a toy or remote may climb the furniture. CPSC says to remove items that tempt kids to climb from the top of TVs and furniture.
Worth remembering: CPSC says a TV that is not wall mounted should still be anchored to the wall.
Groan of the day: What does a house wear? Address!
Sources: Anchor It, U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission
Chapter 13: Storage and Backups
Short answer: No, fridge magnets are too weak
Old floppy disks could be wiped by a simple magnet. But modern computer drives require a massively powerful industrial magnet to lose data.
Worth remembering: Solid state drives, which are in most new laptops, do not use magnetism at all and are completely immune.
Groan of the day: Why did the magnet get promoted? It was very attractive.
Sources: Apex Magnets: Can a Strong Magnet Wipe Out a Hard Drive?
Short answer: 3 copies, 2 kinds of storage, 1 offsite
- Too little: One copy on your phone is enough
- Too much: Back up daily to five drives at home
- Just right: 3 copies, 2 kinds, 1 offsite
Keep three copies, on at least two kinds of storage, with one somewhere else, like the cloud. Then a fire, theft or dead drive can't take everything.
Worth remembering: Different media can be paper and a scanned PDF.
Groan of the day: Why was the computer so smart? It listened to its motherboard.
Sources: Texas State Library and Archives Commission: 3-2-1 Backup Rule
Short answer: Decimal vs binary ways of counting
Drive makers call 1,000,000,000 bytes a GB. Windows divides by 1,073,741,824 but still labels the result GB. The same 1 TB drive therefore appears as about 931 GB.
Worth remembering: Seagate's conversion table shows a marketed 1 TB drive as about 931 GB in Windows.
Groan of the day: Why did the computer show up late? It had a hard drive.
Sources: Why does my hard drive report less capacity than indicated on the drive's label? (Seagate)
Chapter 14: Disasters and Preparedness
Short answer: Basement or interior room away from windows
Go to a basement, safe room, or interior room away from windows. Act when the warning arrives.
Worth remembering: Bring pets along if time allows.
Groan of the day: What do you call a tornado’s favorite game? Twister.
Sources: National Weather Service: What to do During a Tornado
Short answer: Drop, cover, and hold on
Drop before shaking knocks you down, cover your head and neck, and hold on to your shelter. Do not run outside through falling hazards while shaking continues.
Worth remembering: A doorway is no safer than other spots in a modern home and does not protect you from falling objects.
Groan of the day: What did one tectonic plate say to the other? Sorry, my fault.
Sources: Drop, Cover, Hold On, U.S. Geological Survey; Drop, Cover, and Hold On, Great ShakeOut (Southern California Earthquake Center)
Short answer: No, stay sheltered
The eye can create a short calm period. Winds then rise rapidly from the opposite direction, so remain sheltered until officials say the danger has passed.
Worth remembering: If no evacuation is ordered, NWS advises an interior room on the lowest level and away from glass.
Groan of the day: Why did the hurricane go to the school dance? It wanted to do the twist!
Sources: Actions to Take When a Hurricane Threatens, National Weather Service
Chapter 15: Trip Planning and Gear
Short answer: A headlamp or flashlight
- Too little: Just a phone and a water bottle
- Too much: A full camping kit for a short walk
- Just right: The Ten Essentials, every hike
The Park Service's Ten Essentials include light, even for day hikes. A slow trail, a wrong turn or an injury can keep you out after dark.
Worth remembering: The other Ten Essentials are navigation, sun protection, extra clothing, first aid, fire, a repair kit, extra food, water and emergency shelter.
Groan of the day: Camping is so intents.
Sources: NPS: The 10 Essentials
Short answer: Emergency shelter, like a space blanket
The Ten Essentials are ten systems for unexpected problems outdoors. Emergency shelter is one of them. A space blanket, tarp or bivy sack can protect you from severe weather and exposure.
Worth remembering: The other nine systems are navigation, sun protection, extra clothing, illumination, first aid, fire, repair tools, food and water.
Groan of the day: I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my Trail Mix.
Sources: 10 Essentials (National Park Service)
Short answer: The biker stops and steps aside
The National Park Service says bicyclists yield to hikers and to horses or other pack stock. The biker should come to a full stop and step to the side.
Worth remembering: Signs can vary from park to park, so check the trailhead for the local right-of-way rules.
Groan of the day: Why can't a bicycle stand on its own? It's two-tired.
Sources: Hiking Etiquette (National Park Service)
Chapter 16: Lightning and Thunder
Short answer: The metal shell around you
- Too little: Leaning on the car outside is fine
- Too much: Cars are never safe in storms
- Just right: Inside a hard-topped car, windows up
Lightning runs through the car's outer metal shell and down to the ground, around the people inside. The tires don't stop it. Stay inside with the windows up.
Worth remembering: Standing outside and leaning on the car is not safe. The protection only works if you're inside.
Groan of the day: What's worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis.
Sources: National Weather Service: Lightning and Cars
Short answer: 5 times hotter than the sun's surface
- Too little: About as hot as a campfire
- Too much: Hotter than the center of the sun
- Just right: 5 times hotter than the sun's surface
Air is bad at carrying electricity, so lightning heats it up fast, to about 50,000°F. That sudden heat makes the air burst outward, and we hear thunder.
Worth remembering: When lightning hits a tree, the heat can boil the water inside and blow off a strip of bark.
Groan of the day: What's the hottest letter of the alphabet? B, because it makes oil boil.
Sources: National Weather Service: How Hot Is Lightning?; National Weather Service: Understanding Lightning: Thunder
Short answer: Air expanding after lightning heats it
Lightning heats the air around it to very high temperatures in a fraction of a second. The air expands explosively and creates the sound wave we hear as thunder.
Worth remembering: The air in a lightning channel can reach about 50,000 degrees F, about 5 times hotter than the surface of the sun.
Groan of the day: Why is it so windy inside an arena? All those fans.
Sources: National Weather Service Thunder Science
Chapter 17: Pay, Hours and Benefits
Short answer: No, it's up to you and your employer
The Fair Labor Standards Act does not require pay for time not worked, such as vacations. Paid vacation is a benefit you agree on with your employer, so ask before you take a job. Some states and cities add their own leave rules.
Worth remembering: The same federal law doesn't require holiday, severance or sick pay either.
Groan of the day: What did the bee say when he got home from work? Honey I'm home!
Sources: US Department of Labor: Vacation Leave; US Department of Labor: Leave Benefits
Short answer: $4.25 an hour
Federal law lets an employer pay a worker under 20 a youth minimum wage of at least $4.25 an hour for the first 90 consecutive calendar days. After that, the youth rate expires.
Worth remembering: The 90-day period counts consecutive calendar days, not only days the employee works.
Groan of the day: Have you heard about the owl sanctuary job opening? It's all night shifts but they're all a hoot over there.
Sources: Fact Sheet #32, Youth Minimum Wage (US Department of Labor)
Short answer: People unemployed through no fault of their own
The Labor Department says you usually qualify if unemployed through no fault of your own. In most states, that means work was unavailable. You must also meet your state's work and wage rules.
Worth remembering: The Labor Department says you generally file with the unemployment program in the state where you worked.
Groan of the day: I was fired from the keyboard factory yesterday. I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
Sources: Unemployment Insurance (US Department of Labor)
Chapter 20: Office Ergonomics
Short answer: Every 30 minutes
Sitting for long periods slows your metabolism and strains your spine. Frequent, short movement breaks keep blood flowing and muscles loose.
Worth remembering: Using a standing desk helps, but walking around is much better than just standing still all day.
Groan of the day: Why did the desk go to the doctor? It had a bad back.
Sources: Mayo Clinic: Sitting risks: How harmful is too much sitting?; NIH PMC: The Acute Effects of Interrupting Prolonged Sitting Time
Short answer: A footrest that supports your feet
Support your feet on the floor or a footrest. Dangling feet are not the recommended desk position.
Worth remembering: Your knees should be about the same height as your hips.
Groan of the day: What do you call a dinosaur with a large vocabulary? A thesaurus.
Sources: OSHA: Computer Workstations, Good Working Positions
Chapter 21: Emergencies and Bad Weather
Short answer: Whenever visibility drops
Headlights help you see and help others see you.
Worth remembering: Many states require headlights with wipers.
Groan of the day: The headlight had a bright future.
Sources: California DMV: An Introduction to Driving
Short answer: No, it can heat 20°F in 10 minutes
- Too little: Crack the windows and run in
- Too much: Leave the engine and AC running
- Just right: Take kids and pets with you
A parked car can heat up 20°F in about 10 minutes, and cracking a window barely helps. Never leave kids or pets inside, even for a quick stop.
Worth remembering: Inside a parked car it can get 40 to 50°F hotter than outside.
Groan of the day: Why did the man put his car in the oven? He wanted a hot rod.
Sources: CDC: Heat and Pets; South Carolina State Fire Marshal: Vehicular Heatstroke Prevention
Chapter 22: Refrigeration and Storage
Short answer: 40°F
Keep the fridge at 40°F or below. An appliance thermometer checks the actual temperature.
Worth remembering: Packed shelves can block the cold air that food needs.
Groan of the day: What do you call a cold dog? A chili dog.
Sources: FDA: Refrigerator Thermometers, Cold Facts about Food Safety
Short answer: No, it stops growth but most survive
FDA says freezing does not kill most bacteria, but it does stop them from growing. Once food thaws, they can start growing again.
Worth remembering: That is why thawed food still needs proper cooking or refrigeration.
Groan of the day: Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie.
Sources: FDA Are You Storing Food Safely
Chapter 23: Leftovers and Reheating
Short answer: 3 to 4 days
Eat refrigerated cooked meat leftovers within 3 to 4 days. Freeze them if you need longer storage.
Worth remembering: The same chart gives refrigerated pizza a 3 to 4 day limit.
Groan of the day: Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It felt crummy.
Sources: FoodSafety.gov: Cold Food Storage Chart
Short answer: Divide into smaller shallow containers
Large pots cool too slowly in the refrigerator. Shallow containers help hot food cool quickly through the danger zone.
Worth remembering: Quick cooling keeps food out of the temperature range where bacteria multiply fastest.
Groan of the day: Waiter, there is a fly in my soup. Don't worry, the spider on the bread will get it.
Sources: FDA Refrigerator Thermometers
Chapter 24: Personal Emergency Safety
Short answer: When the call-taker tells you to
Stay on the line until the call-taker tells you to hang up. Follow their instructions while help is coming.
Worth remembering: Be ready to give the emergency’s location, including its street address.
Groan of the day: Why did the ambulance bring a pencil? To draw attention.
Sources: National 911 Program: Calling 911
Short answer: When calling is not possible or safe
- Too little: Never contact 911 by text
- Too much: Always text, it's quicker
- Just right: Text when a voice call is not possible
Calling is still best. Text 911 if you can't speak or it isn't safe to talk. Put your exact location in the first text.
Worth remembering: If texting isn't available where you are, you'll get an automatic reply telling you to make a voice call.
Groan of the day: What did the mouse say to the keyboard? You're just my type.
Sources: City of Richmond, VA, Emergency Communications: Text-to-911; City of Richmond, VA, Emergency Communications: Text-to-911
Chapter 25: Bank Accounts
Short answer: No, not once it's 6 months old
- Too little: Toss it, old checks are worthless
- Too much: Let it sit another year
- Just right: Deposit checks soon, or ask for a new one
A check that's 6 months old or more is called stale-dated. The bank may still pay it, but it doesn't have to. Try it, or ask the writer for a new one.
Worth remembering: Whoever writes a check can set a shorter limit by writing "not good after X days" on it.
Groan of the day: I used to work at a calendar factory, but I got fired for taking a couple of days off.
Sources: OCC HelpWithMyBank.gov: Glossary (Stale-Dated Check)
Short answer: Only if you opted in to that coverage
- Too little: Never look at your balance
- Too much: Pay only in cash forever
- Just right: Know your opt-in choice and watch your balance
For ATM and one-time debit card purchases, a bank needs your OK before charging overdraft fees. If you didn't opt in, the purchase is usually just declined. Checks and auto-pay bills follow different rules.
Worth remembering: Opting in is your choice, and you can change your mind later.
Groan of the day: I'm so broke, I can't even pay attention.
Sources: CFPB: Regulation E, 12 CFR 1005.17 Requirements for overdraft services; CFPB: Understanding the Overdraft Opt-in Choice
Chapter 26: Credit Cards
Short answer: How long payoff takes paying only the minimum
- Too little: Pay only the minimum, forever
- Too much: Skip groceries to pay it off
- Just right: Pay more than the minimum when you can
Card companies must show how long paying only the minimum would take. The box also shows what to pay each month to finish in 3 years. Paying more means less interest.
Worth remembering: Those numbers assume you stop using the card. New purchases make payoff take longer.
Groan of the day: What's the longest word in the dictionary? Smiles. There's a mile between the first and last letter.
Sources: CFPB: A box on my credit card bill says I will pay off the balance in three years...
Short answer: 60 days
The federal billing-error process requires your letter to reach the issuer within 60 days after the first bill showing the error was sent. Check each statement so you do not miss the window.
Worth remembering: Mail the dispute to the address for billing inquiries, not the one where you send payments.
Groan of the day: A duck walks into a pharmacy and says, give me some chap-stick, and put it on my bill.
Sources: Using Credit Cards and Disputing Charges (FTC Consumer Advice)
Chapter 27: Water Safety and Rescue
Short answer: Parallel to the shore
- Too little: Just let it carry you out to sea
- Too much: Swim straight at shore until exhausted
- Just right: Swim sideways out of it, then angle in
Don't fight the current. NOAA says swim parallel to the shore, then swim back to land at an angle. Rip currents are narrow, so going sideways gets you out.
Worth remembering: A rip current is not a rip tide; NOAA says the two terms are often confused.
Groan of the day: Why is the ocean always blue? Because the shore never waves back.
Sources: NOAA Ocean Service: What is a rip current?
Short answer: At least 4 inches
- Too little: Walk out once it looks frozen
- Too much: Wait until cars are driving on it
- Just right: Check for 4 inches of clear ice
Minnesota DNR says stay off new, clear ice under 4 inches thick. Ice can be thick in one spot and thin a few yards away, so check as you go.
Worth remembering: White ice, from snow that melted and refroze, is only about half as strong as clear ice, so it needs twice the thickness.
Groan of the day: What do you call an old snowman? Water.
Sources: Minnesota DNR: General ice thickness guidelines
Chapter 28: Plumbing and Water
Short answer: Cool it, put it in a container, trash it
- Too little: Pour it down the sink
- Too much: Call a plumber for every pan
- Just right: Cool it, can it, trash it
Hot water and soap only move grease farther down the pipe. There it cools, sticks to the inside and builds up into a clog. Cool it and trash it instead.
Worth remembering: Wipe greasy pans with a paper towel before washing them, so less grease goes down the drain.
Groan of the day: What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
Sources: EPA: How to Care for Your Septic System; NYC Department of Environmental Protection: Disposing of Grease at Home; City of Mesa: Safe Disposal of Fats, Oils, Grease and Personal Items
Short answer: Water sitting in the P-trap
A P-trap holds a small water seal between the room and the drain system. If that seal disappears, sewer odors can enter.
Worth remembering: The plumbing code says most trap seals must be at least 2 inches and no more than 4 inches deep.
Groan of the day: Why couldn't the plumber get a date? Because he was a real drip.
Sources: Overview of Plumbing Trap Requirements, International Code Council
Chapter 29: Indoor Hazards
Short answer: Test the air with a radon test
- Too little: Assume newer homes are fine
- Too much: Move out at the first worry
- Just right: Run a simple radon test
Radon is a natural gas from the ground that you can't see or smell. Old or new, any home can have it, so testing is the only way to know. EPA says to test every home.
Worth remembering: A high result can be fixed. EPA's radon motto is: Test. Fix. Save a life.
Groan of the day: Why are chemists good at solving problems? They have all the solutions.
Sources: EPA: Radon; EPA: Radon
Short answer: One-quarter inch
Mice can enter through surprisingly tiny openings. Checking pencil-width gaps helps find possible entry points.
Worth remembering: The CDC recommends looking for gaps both inside and outside a home.
Groan of the day: What kind of music do mice like? Mouse-ic.
Sources: Seal Up to Prevent Rodents, CDC
Chapter 30: Insurance and Consumer Protection
Short answer: Generally no, unless they're free
Under federal warranty law, a maker can't require specific parts or services to keep coverage, unless it provides them free or gets an FTC waiver. A part that actually causes damage is a different story.
Worth remembering: Whenever there's a warranty, the law says it must be available for you to read before you buy.
Groan of the day: Where do cats write notes? Scratch paper!
Sources: Warranties (FTC Consumer Advice)
Short answer: Never, it doesn't expire
Some people think they must sign up again every few years. The FTC says your registration will never expire. It's free at DoNotCall.gov.
Worth remembering: Being on the list won't stop scammers, who make illegal calls anyway.
Groan of the day: My phone's autocorrect is obsessed with ducks. It's a real quack addict.
Sources: National Do Not Call Registry FAQs (FTC Consumer Advice)
Chapter 31: Household Safety
Short answer: Call a licensed electrician
Repeated tripping or failure to reset can signal a fault that needs diagnosis. Do not defeat the protection or attempt live electrical work.
Worth remembering: Leviton says persistent tripping can point to moisture in the wiring or a damaged circuit.
Groan of the day: Why are electricians always up to date? Because they are current specialists.
Sources: What to Do When Your GFCI Trips, Leviton
Short answer: Gently vacuum it
Dust can obstruct a smoke alarm's sensor. Gentle monthly vacuuming is a manufacturer-recommended cleaning step.
Worth remembering: Kidde says if you do not know how old a smoke alarm is, replace it.
Groan of the day: Why did the smoke alarm join the band? Because it had the perfect pitch!
Sources: Choosing the Best Types of Smoke Alarms for Your Home, Kidde
Chapter 32: Repairs and Maintenance
Short answer: Clean, dry, and free of old caulk
Caulk needs sound, clean material to grip. Dirt, moisture, and old loose caulk interfere with the new bead.
Worth remembering: DAP's caulk instructions say to apply it when the temperature is above 40 degrees Fahrenheit.
Groan of the day: Why did the carpenter become a stand-up comedian? Because he always nailed his punchlines!
Sources: 100% Silicone Kitchen, Bath and Plumbing Sealant Technical Data Sheet, DAP
Short answer: Each year
Annual professional inspection and cleaning help identify chimney hazards before fireplace season. Waiting for an obvious problem is too late.
Worth remembering: The same USFA card says to keep anything that can burn at least three feet from a fireplace or wood stove.
Groan of the day: Why did Santa go down the chimney? Because it sooted him.
Sources: Fireplace and Wood Stove Safety, U.S. Fire Administration